Mar 6, 2011

Totally Awesome Rep. Susan Fagan Somehow Gets Even More Doggone Awesome (Despite Having Lamont In Her District!!)

District 9 State Representative Susan Fagan, already one of the sharpest and most capable governmental ‘wunderkinds’ to come down the pike since Honest Abe and that Thomas Jefferson feller did whatever it was that they did that seemed to impress everyone so much, is breaking her own seemingly insurmountable records for awesomeness, even though she knows deep down that her otherwise sharp and hard working District must carry the ‘Mark of Cain’ in the form of Lamont, a hapless, wayward, backward-looking, some might say ‘neanderthal-ish’ hamlet that could not even manage to put in a public restroom after 100 years (and doesn't even have a store now!) because of a small cabal of Luddite-like farmers/ranchers who view such things as unnecessary extravagances and somehow unseemly!! Rep. Fagan, a person with a steel spine yet a heart of gold, who proved beyond any reasonable doubt her mettle for national leadership after she spent any number of hours at the seemingly interminable Lamont 100 Year Festival (that was boycotted by many of these same ‘toilet-averse’ farmers/ranchers who say they love the Town so much but want to see it reduced to rubble thru neglect and inattention!! Oh, brother!), just recently gave one of those citizen ‘Town Hall’ things where people could call in or listen on the phone (How did she do that? Whoa! Is she Bill Gates or something, too!!) and her clear vision, almost uncanny common sense, poise and solid American values left everyone pretty much gob-smacked and begging for her to become queen or President or Governor or whatever! (For the sake of full disclosure, the Lamont Blog, the news source of record in far, far, far Northwest Whitman County endorsed Rep. Fagan for Governor sometime back, although shockingly enough she failed to heed this powerful endorsement and has since worked wonders for District 9 in Olympia instead).

“Well, I listened to the Susan Fagan Town Hall meeting and heard her stance on the issues facing our region and nation, and to be honest, I have half a mind to get off the Lamont Council and devote my energies to her” said a Lamont councilman of 15 years. “I have been around a lot of years, and individuals like Susan Fagan are about as rare in these parts as hen’s teeth. If we had more people like her in positions of authority this country would not be in the mess it is in!” he gushed! “Oh, and being a former military man, her grit and determination, as demonstrated by her stalwart attendance at our 100 year festival, certainly qualifies her for Commander and Chief, if you ask me! If she can withstand that, she can certainly take on our national enemies, both foreign and domestic!” he mused proudly while raising his hand in a smart salute.

(Editorial Note: We at the Lamont Blog would like to apologize to Rep. Fagan, R. – Pullman, for Lamont being the fly in her district ointment and would encourage her to remain strong and resolute, in spite of the fact that we tend to tug down her averages (the good ones) in almost every category imaginable. Thank you!)

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