Local Councilman Caught Being All “Bright-Eyed and Bushy-Tailed” At 6:00 AM On A Saturday

Contrary to all known stereotypes related to council members in general and the Lamont Council in particular, a local public servant was observed bouncing around his yard and doing “odd jobs” at an obscene hour when any normal person would be tucked in bed - dreading the start of another day filled with the ragged shards of shattered hopes and broken dreams. “Well, I was going to let my dog out to do his business when, out of the corner of my eye, I saw this little blur of activity across the way and knew that something was very, very wrong.” said a neighbor. “At first I just assumed that he was having another psychotic episode and that I needed to call the town men to subdue him until the medication could kick in, but then I saw, much to my horror, that he was just getting a jump on his busy day! That’s just wrong!!! If people want to act like that, they should buy property out in the county where that sort of thing is tolerated – not in a town where children are present!! We have to have some rules and standards here” she fumed.

Although monitoring the situation closely, the Mayor, freshly awakened from his log-like repose, was powerless to stem this tide of productivity or crush this unseemly “can-do” spirit. “Well, I am as shocked and horrified as the rest of the community, but until he extends this anti-social behavior to Town property or begins sprucing up a neighbor’s lot we are basically powerless to stop him. The lawmakers in Olympia really need to tighten up the code so things like this just don’t happen and slovenly, lazy citizens don’t have to see this sort of thing” he said.