Sep 30, 2008
Mayor Creates Fantasy "Mental Image" Of Town Engineer's Office In Spite Of Never Having Been There
In a disturbing case of projection and taking a few data points and expanding them into a complete social scenario, an area Mayor has, over the years, built a complete and highly detailed "imaginary" workplace where amazing feats of engineering are done with breathtaking efficiency, solid American values and slapstick-like camaraderie. "Well, all I have ever seen is the fantastic output of that 'miracle factory' that they call Century West Engineering - and have met a few of the employees and of course the big burrito - Dennis Fuller. But the thing that spurred my sense of a utopian social nirvana was talking to the women who answer the phone when I call to ask dumb questions" said the decidedly envious Mayor. "Those ladies just seem so friendly, efficient, smart and professional that I could just kick myself for being a lifelong math laggard and thus self-excluded from the Olympian heights of the ever-glamorous engineering profession. What the heck was I thinking when I was not paying attention in my formative math years, dang it?!!!" he sniveled. "I could be mingling with the 'beautiful people' if I would have just forced myself to learn long division, geometry and that whole decimal thing!!" he said self-reprovingly. “Oh, what is squandered away in youth is sorely cherished in old age” he said melodramatically and completely out of all conceivable context to the situation.
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Albert Einstein weren't no good at schoolin' neither and look how he turned out? Up and built himself a big azz bomb! You buildin' a big azz bomb from an old oak barrel there, son? There's no ordnance ordinance for it, that I recall, so go ahead. Just don't be chippin' the park tables with it, or park it up on blocks in the yard and hoistin' the Jolly Roger and partin' it out for a cannon in Pirate Dave's shipyard. Y'arrr!
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