Dec 8, 2008

Entire Town Stunned And Saddened After Tragic Loss - Worse Disaster Thankfully Avoided

The Town of Lamont received an unexpected yet staggering blow this week after a series of improbable miscues occurred simultaneously and the 'winds of ill-omen" blew their gusty mischief outside of the Community Center in the late morning of December 7th, 2008. "Well, the details are still sketchy, but it appears that one of the 'Pillars of the Palouse', while dropping off a hot dish for the potluck before church, was attempting to open the locked door with one hand while balancing a smooth, creamy, historically delicious casserole dish in the other. Thru a combination of bad luck, Murphy's Law and no small amount of meddlesome intervention by Chaos himself, somehow the highly prized and unbelievably tantalizing and aromatic casserole made a nose dive onto the sidewalk - carrying the kitchen icon's favorite baking dish with it" said a stunned and shaken bachelor who is all thumbs in the kitchen and unfortunately saw the remains of the melted cheese by the doorjamb. "Oh, the horror! Who is ever prepared for a sight like that on an empty stomach? It was enough to break your heart! I waited all month for that smooth yet savory concoction of indescribable deliciousness. I guess I'll have to double up on green bean casserole now. Life can be so unmerciful, so cruel!." he said. "Nobody makes a casserole like (name deleted to avoid litigation)

"It is in times like these that we all need to band together, console each other and just try to pick up the pieces, literally and figuratively, and move past this" said the Mayor. "Although a tragedy in every sense of the word, all of us are just thankful that it was that poor casserole that had to be sacrificed on the alter of life's little foibles and not the world famous 'Chocolate Lush' that was in the van waiting to be unloaded. If the Chocolate Lush had been lost to the cruel whims of fancy, the Town would have had to break out the black arm-bands and do that whole 'flag at half mast' thing. That would be unfortunate in the Christmas season." said the subdued and introspective Mayor who can't manage to bring anything more complicated to a potluck than Deviled Eggs - although he does put a dash of paprika on them for that extra fancy touch. "Going to the dessert table for a delicious, cool, creamy, rich piece of Chocolate Lush is the best way to begin the actual healing process - and I encourage all the citizens to join me there about 1:45 or so. We need to just pick ourselves up, be thankful for what we indeed do have and go back for seconds, if necessary" he said.

1 comment:

Black In Back said...

I heard I was supposed to bring some kind of dish. I couldn't remember what the lady said. Cassiarole? Cascararole? One has cinnamon as the primary ingredient; the other will make you bolt the bathroom door and tie yourself down to the seat to keep the afterburner from sending you into low Lamont orbit.

Considering what most people are so full of, I chose to fix the latter.

I didn't know exactly how to do it so I had a friend help me. I took a little walk and then she did the baking. I didn't have a bottle of Cascara Sagrada to add to the mix, so I found a buckthorn tree, stripped some of the bark and ran it through the blender. In answer to the question, "Will it blend?" The answer is YES!

I braved the bitter cold to get the bark for the dish because the fresh stuff is so much more powerful than capsules. I hope everyone appreciated the effort. That's why it's called "potluck", right?

For those about to launch, we salute you!